Of Noble Stock

This is a small work of fiction that I wrote.  The commmon term for this is “microfiction” or “flashfiction”.

I’ve got a TON of these.

(special thanks to Lys for the idea of taking a screenshot and turning it into a picture. I did that to deter plagerism. If you wanna steal my words you gotta work for them!)

Pizza For Breakfast?

Location:  Benton Park
Purpose:  8am meeting to setup a new computer/cash register at an art gallery.
Mood:      Royally pissed but full.

So, this client of mine expressed the life and/or death need for me to be at his new art gallery this morning at 8am. Nevermind the fact that I don’t have keys to get into the building, let alone that Charter will not be here to install the internet until noon. (side note:  Charter said they would be here between 8 – Noon. So in cable guy land, that really means “Whenever the f*ck I feel like showing up”.) 

So I show up bright-eyed and bushy-tailed at 7:55am.
All the lights are off.
All the doors are locked.
No one is here!
Ok, that’s cool. I showed up 5 minutes early. I’ll give him a little time. 30 minutes later and still no-show and I can’t reach him by cell phone.

Enter the pizza.

This art gallery is inside of a building that has a cafe next to it with wireless internet.  Ok. I’ll go connect my laptop and get some coffee whilst I wait for this jackhole to show up. I order my coffee and the required hip coffee shop guy brings me a menu. 

There it is. Right at the top of the menu.

BREAKFAST PIZZA. A FLAKY CRUST EGG PIZZA WITH YOUR CHOICE OF TOPPINGS.
Toppings include:  Cheese, onions, avocado, tomato, bacon, ham, green peppers.

I order up a meat-lovers and sit back contemplating how I could not have known such a thing existed.
Waiter brings it out and I eye this culinary concoction with suspicion and food lust. Nothing should look this delicious. 

A meaty, cheesy egg-splosion happened in my mouth. I think I heard a loud CRACK! like a whip popping and the first piece was already gone. A cool breeze came in through the open door and dried the single tear coming down my cheek. 

The devil must be a short-order breakfast cook in St. Louis because I would sell my soul to get another one of these.
Luckily it will only take another $8.

Office Politico

It’s so interesting to see what vastly different people will choose to make an issue of when forced to share the same office space. 

It’s fun to talk to this person as they rail against some perceived ridiculous company policy and then go talk to that person as they complain about people not following the new policy they just had a hand in putting in place. 

Is it wrong to enjoy these little diatribes? To inject a little dissent? Just a simple nod of the head or agreement of  ”Yep” is enough to solidify their convictions.

Little Generals in charge of their own ink-pen armies, gesticulating wildly and strategizing.  Strutting about in their closed-door empires, certain of the victory to come while firing volleys of paper from their company printers.

Noise

Click-clacks, beeps and whirring are all I hear all day. 

People coughing. People sneezing. People talking, clearing their throats. 

It’s noisy everywhere.

Hello world!

Dun dun da DUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNNN.

 

It’s me!

 

I love my spicy woman!